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PETAV: “Vegetables Have Rights Too!”
In a move nobody asked for, the newest radical advocacy group, PETAV (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals and Vegetables), stormed the dietary ethics scene, demanding rights not…
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God Turns to AI: “I Know Everything, Just Not All at Once”
Heaven has quietly integrated artificial intelligence into divine operations, with God Himself acknowledging its usefulness. “Of course I know everything,” He said. “But sometimes, when someone asks about a…
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Helium Secures Top Spot After Intense Lobbying Campaign
GENEVA — In a historic reshuffling that’s rocked the chemical community, the International Periodic Table Rankings Association (IPTRA) announced Monday that helium has officially overtaken hydrogen as the top…
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Boeing Airlines: Crash Guaranteed or Your Money Back
In an audacious twist on air travel, Boeing Airlines has launched a ‘Controlled Crash Experience,’ inviting thrill-seekers to enjoy the unique sensation of surviving a plane crash. Bandaged and…
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Humanity officially out of jokes
“Folks, tonight I’m gonna tell the last joke ever. After this, it’s all taxes and weather reports. Forever.” Nervous laughter rippled across the room. In the frostbitten depths of…